Home > Eataly’s gelato rapes Grom in the ass after I gave them a volume increase.

June 4th, 2012 Posted in Uncategorized

Who cares, but today I went to eat gelato at Eataly.  Ice cream, gelato and frozen yogurt are reaching epic prices in NYC of late.  Prices as high as $7-8 PER SCOOP, and the scoops are so small I could eat the whole thing in one bite.  The biggest offender is L’arte del Gelato in Chelsea Market and on the highline.  Grom is another joke who decreased their size while simultaneously increasing their prices.   Only thing is, Grom is the best.  I still won’t eat it due to their scamming, but now they’ve just got their ass handed to them by Eataly, whose gelato is just as good and the charge only $5.90 (tax included) for waffle cone with THREE fat scoops.  It’s all about the scoopage!

Prior to this discovery, I would go to Cones artesian italian ice cream which isn’t gelato-more like a hybrid between ice cream and gelato due to the fact it comes from Italy and they use egg in the manufacture of their product.  Chinatown Ice Cream Factory has degenerated into a shithole, as they raised their prices, dropped their quality, and their employees are the rudest pieces of shit who are too cheap to turn up the refrigeration units and serve melted ice cream.  They used to rule, now they suck massive wino penis.  Sundays and Cones is Chinese-owned and the BEST ice cream place in the city.  They beat the shit out of Chinatown Ice Cream Factory any day of the week.  They are also competitively priced.

So if you want the best ice cream or gelato, and you don’t want to pay through the nose for it, here is my list:

3.Sundaes and Cones

Eataly as has the most pussy.  It is next to Madison Square Park, 23rd Street has the biggest concentration of hot women in NYC.

I was sitting on a standpipe sprinkler yesterday eating my gelato, and some twat starts standing next to me and milling about doing nothing.  After a while I thought it may be a proximity play, so I opened her loud and clear.  She ignored me.  Nothing pisses me off more then when I open a woman and she pretends like I am not there.  I mean, I know the bitch heard me!  So I stuck my cone in her face. ROTFL!  She starts freaking out, so I repeat my opener even louder.  She looks at me very annoyed.  I continue:

“Do you speak English?”

She shakes her head.

Well, once I saw her face I was glad she didn’t, so I ceased my abuse even though she probably did speak English.  Had I continued, I would said something like:

“Oh, because I was going to ask you if you would take my volume incrtook it up the ass.”

Then I’d know for sure if she spoke English or not! LOL!

Anyway, so that is the story about gelato in this town.  Access to the finest gelato at a respectable price is something that really impacts my quality of life.  Like having a bidet in your house, or one of those hoses you can use to spray your ass after you shit.  Hygiene is very important!




Plato Powers writes regularly about anything that involves men's sexual health and all the adventures that a homosapien male encounters in his everyday life.

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