I was watching Fox News tonight and all these idiots are babbling about who is going to win the next election and I’m like Obama is going to be our next president because he is the alpha male and that’s that.  The Republicans have no alpha male candidates.  Mitt Romney?  Ron Paul?  Newt Gingrich?

I like Ron Paul but he is anything but an alpha male.  His son is even worse.  Newt Gingrich is a fat, shifty-eyed doughboy and Mitt Romney looks uncomfortable in his skin.

But take a look at Obama.  He has what every other president has had which is alpha male qualities.  Look at Obama, Bush, and Clinton.  They have that calmness which only sociopaths who believe they are at the top of the food chain have, and THAT is what people vote for because it makes them secure.  Issues?   Nobody votes on fucking issues. They vote on mammalian and reptilian impulses, which is why Obama cocks his head to the side and does that annoying shit where you would be like:

“We needed to increase sperm count in this nation and you did nothing.”

Obama would just reply:

“Well… you know… it is totally understandable for, um… the nation to be angry… when its’ sexual function is (cocks head to expose carotid artery) … not up to standard.”

If you listen to him it’s the same old shit out of some manipulation playbook.  But it fucking works, and you can use these observations to pick up chicks.

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